Setting up a safer mealtime

Before the meal

• Check they are awake and alert. Wait if they are drowsy.
• Help them sit fully upright, in a chair if they can.
• Put in dentures, glasses and hearing aids.
• Turn off the TV. A quiet room helps them focus.
• If a food or drink level was agreed, have that ready.

During the meal

• Sit at eye level beside them, not standing above.
• Offer small bites and small sips.
• Let them finish one mouthful before the next.
• Go at their pace. Keep talk light, and wait with questions until their mouth is empty.
• Use any swallowing tips they have learned and chosen to use.

After the meal

• Staying upright for a while after eating is often advised. Ask the SLP how long.
• Check the mouth for leftover food.
• Brush teeth or clean dentures.

What you might notice

• Coughing, throat clearing or watery eyes while eating.
• A wet or gurgly voice.
• Food held in the mouth or left in the cheeks.
• Meals taking much longer, or eating less.
• Getting tired partway through the meal.

What can help

The meal belongs to the person eating. Their wishes about food matter, even when choices carry some risk.

• Talk choices through with them: what they want, what worries them, and the trade-offs.
• Write down what you notice. A log helps everyone see the pattern.
• Ask an SLP to show you the set-up in person.
• Take a first aid class. The American Red Cross runs them.
• Look after yourself too. Helping at every meal is tiring.

Questions to ask your care team

• What set-up and pace make sense for them?
• Which signs mean something has changed?
• What are their options if meals get harder, and the trade-offs of each?
• How can I support what they choose, safely?
• Can someone show me in person?

When to get help

Get checked soon if you notice any of these. A doctor or SLP can look at what is going on.

• Coughing or choking when you eat or drink.
• Food or pills that feel stuck.
• Losing weight without trying.
• Pneumonia or chest infections, especially if they come back.